How Does One Grow, Though?
In our experience, growth didn’t happen until we found safety. Only when safety arrived—and we had time to sit, breathe, and let our bodies unclench—did we recognise the years of stored trauma we’d been carrying.
The specific trauma we stored isn’t the story we’re here to tell. Sharing that wouldn’t serve the purpose of this message. Life is about lessons learned and lessons shared. We’re here to explain how we got here, in the hope that it helps even one person recognise their truth.
So, here’s the secret: true growth only begins when you find a place where your central nervous system can finally rest. Once we reached that place, we were able to crack open years of mental and emotional trauma that had been building there and calcifying with time. But chipping away at the calcification and opening up wasn’t instantaneous—it came in drips.
Visual: Imagine a dam with a tiny leak. Slowly, water starts to seep through, wearing away the limestone walls holding it back from wreaking havoc on the village that lay in front of it (the village being your life that you constructed, the people you put in it, the job you took, the relationships you built, and the routine you have created for yourself). Eventually, a perfect storm, the pressure building and the walls internally breaking down—it becomes too much, and the dam bursts, releasing and tearing down everything at once—without caring whose realities it tears down in the process.
Until this process happens for you, true growth might feel just... out of reach. That doesn’t mean there aren’t lessons to learn along the way. Every missed opportunity, broken relationship, and lived trauma becomes part of a bigger picture. But here’s the thing—when the dam breaks, and everything falls apart, it isn’t the end. It’s the beginning. It’s a chance to rebuild, to reassess what belongs in your life and what doesn’t. Growth isn’t just about healing; it’s about transformation. You’re not piecing back together the old version of yourself—you’re creating something entirely new. And here’s the beauty of it: only when you are far enough away, when the noise has faded and you’re standing in the right conditions, can you finally see clearly. Life is like a chaotic painting; what once looked like a mess reveals itself as a masterpiece. Perspective is the gift of distance.
And in that distance, clarity arrives like an old friend—gentle yet undeniable. You begin to see not just what broke you, but what built you. The trials weren’t just obstacles; they were chisels, carving out the person you were always meant to be. The chaos was never random—it was the brushstroke of a grander design, waiting for you to step back far enough to witness the full picture.
Visual: Picture climbing to the top of a mountain on a foggy morning, where you normally see the city you live in below. After walking up the terrain, crawling under broken branches, and jumping over rocks that block the path, you finally make it to the top. As expected, you can’t see the view—fog covers every inch of the city. Suddenly, a breeze sweeps through, cool and steady, wrapping around you like the earth itself is embracing you, whispering that you are safe now. As the wind holds you, the fog begins to lift, revealing the city below—a city that once housed all your darkest days. But from this height, it looks smaller. You’ve made it.
That is what it’s like when you surrender to stillness—when you give your body permission to rest and your mind the sacred space to remember. In the quiet, the truths long buried rise to the surface, and the fog begins to lift. It’s in this sacred pause that you rediscover the fragments of yourself you thought were lost, piecing together the story of who you truly are.
The human experience is an incredible one that you can only fully appreciate when the fog lifts. So, as you can see, to truly grow, you need to remove yourself from everyone and everything (well, at least that is how it came about in our experience). Give yourself the space to breathe. Strip away the noise, the expectations, the pressures. Reintroduce people into your life one by one. And here’s the key: anyone who causes your central nervous system anxiety—remove them. You do not need a reason—but here is one: your body is telling you what it truly needs.
It might not be that the person causing you anxiety or fatigue is wrong for your life forever. But right now, your body is signalling that it needs space from that specific character in your story. Be honest with them: explain that you’re going through a lot, that you love them, and that if they truly need you, they can always reach out. But let them know you need time to work on yourself—to become the best version of you, for yourself and everyone around you, including them.
Give yourself six months to a year of hibernation—meditation, journaling, self-care, rest. Watch your favourite shows, read books, work out as much or as little as you can. Don’t rush the process. Allow yourself to thaw, like a frozen meal slowly defrosting.
At Prospere, we’ve been through it all. So we decided to make that our superpower. Now, our purpose is to help people grow to their next level—whether that’s personal growth or business development. And if you’ve already achieved society’s version of success, we have something to say to you:
No matter how successful you are, you can’t truly win in life without learning who you are. If you’ve gained everything material before discovering your true self, we empathise deeply. Without hunger, curiosity starves. And it was curiosity—that childlike hunger to understand—that led us here.
We lost everything and everyone, including the version of ourselves we created to survive. But losing it all gave us the chance to start fresh. To rebuild from the ground up. To curate our lives—and our minds—until everything fit just right.
If you’re ready to work with one of our consultants, coaches, or recruiters to discover what truly works for you in this life, reach out. We’ve got you. Send us a message to book in or receive our no-obligation starter pack.
